Today, to be honest, I am not in a writing mood, rather, I am in a I-just-want-to-sit-down-and-paint-for-hours-and-hours-but-I-have-things-to-do... mood. Such is life! I tend to fill my time and take advantage of opportunities for work and socialization and general getting involved, and I do love being busy in all of those things and am thankful for them, but I also forget that I might not necessarily need me-time, but I apparently need me-project-time! Perhaps tomorrow I will get my Witness for Peace writing done in apt time to sit down and pursue another art! There's a decent goal. And I'm thinking aloud, or rather writing semi-stream of consciousness, but I appreciate this outlet.
I also appreciate free spelt bread and sweet potatoes from my housemate who works at the co-op. She was able to bring home potatoes that did not look so great but are still very much in good shape, and spelt bread that was past when it should legally be on the shelf but is still perfectly good. I do not like to have special dietary needs because I do not like other people to go out of their way for me, and since I figured out I should just avoid wheat, I have not eaten bread in ages. But it was so wonderful to have a grass-fed hamburger on two slices of doughy bread today! I'm thankful for the food I have been given and how it has nourished my body and my soul.
I'm also thankful for a couple of sources of inspiration today. The Encouragement of the Day email in my inbox began with this verse: "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust
in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy
Spirit." Romans 15:13 (NIV). Kind of what I mentioned yesterday, no? Well-timed. The author went off of this verse and wrote, "The pain of our past makes it hard to believe God's promise of hope
for our future. It's easy to lose confidence in God, in other people and
especially in ourselves... I learned to trust and hope again, too. And I made a new vow — I
promised myself and God that I would not allow the pain of my past to
determine my future any more." We have all been hurt by people we consider acquaintances, friends, enemies, and love, but I keep going back to a pivotal message from a sermon at my home church a year back: "Let your vulnerabilities go. You might just get loved into being who you are meant to be."
No matter your scars and past hurts, may your eyes and judgment be discerning, but may your heart be open to love and hope and joy today and all days.
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